transformations

I just drove 1500 miles to spend a week with my second family to try to help them reckon with the impending death of my friend, Mike, of 30 years. He is struggling mightily, and as his acupuncturist of many years, I offered some healing work. Amid the complexity of his condition and my lack of active practice, it was hard to know how much work to do, but it gave us space to connect in a healing way.

While I was in Indiana, I met the daughter of Pastor Phil who I stayed with in Indianapolis a few years ago, and who had since died suddenly in a car accident. I also saw my friend Viona who, along with her husband Ken, I stayed with for a couple months last time I lived there. Ken is Mike's uncle, and died of a sudden illness last year. It was the first time I'd seen Viona since, and was glad to hear her reassurance that Ken had come to acceptance around his death.

I then drove 1500 miles to spend two days with my sister, Martha, whose death is also impending. She has not been the same since her closest friend took her own life without warning several months ago. As my sister loses the last functions of her body, she is actively planning her own death. The kids will likely never see her again. While in NY, I took my niece to the beach, and had a frightening moment losing her under a wave. She is fine, but in that moment I changed.

I returned back to Indiana to play violin at the Sunday service on my way back. One of the church elders had died in a bizarre accident during the days I was gone, which heightened the significance of the closing piece I had chosen, I'll Fly Away. Some people cried.

Later, as I was preparing to leave Mike, I was sitting with his wife Judi, and daughter Ambrosia, admiring their strength. A friend of Mike's, the only man I know to have achieved awakening in his zen practice, came by to see Mike. Before he had left, another powerful presence arrived in Cliff Kindy, leader of Christian Peacemaker Teams for years in Iraq and Gaza, to see Mike as well. He asked Mike, "What do we need to do to help the world persist amidst all that is going on?" He answered, "It's just there."

Then I drove 1500 miles home.