photos from the land

something

today i am bored
i am not sure why
the clouds are moving fast
pretty and close enough to touch
what need is not met
companionship perhaps
meaningful contribution?

i'd rather be throwing hay bales
but at least i have coffee now
and maybe some inspiration to do something
with the remainder of my time in this sick society
before i head off and join the amish or leave for peru

last night i experienced the nurturing feminine:
dancing closely with two beautiful women
in honest playful appreciation
before heading off early to milk the girls
itsy, souffle and stella
and then sleeping deeply for ten hours

i'll be ordering some milking supplies today
a stainless bucket, carrier and strainer
so i guess that's something

on labors and Love

I have become a bartering laborer.

Yesterday, I helped a friend jam a storage shed, far too small for the job, full of possessions acquired over his some sixty-plus years. It was an insanity of odd angles, with futons and ladders jammed into the last square inches left amidst fragile boxes shotput over the top of previously avalanched stacks. I offered to do it for nothing, or a meal or whatever, but he threw a Franklin at me. It was great fun.

Conversations, on the other hand, with their projections and politics, issues and confusions, I have little taste for. It is fascinating to me that work has become tremendous fun, while socializing has offered the greatest suffering. Even this as I wrote in my journal last night brings forth a prayer: May this suffering initiate my attention to blessing and my intention to bless.

A few days ago, I unloaded some 50 hay bales, after work, before transporting a friend's sauna in a borrowed truck. I got home after 9 pm, and a 14-plus hour day. I was very sore the next day, like I haven't been since old farming days. I even felt a touch of anger, from the sheer stiffness and exhaustion of the body. But I was still able to unload a couple tons of wine at work. And the following day, the soreness had given way to normal wellness.

I am grateful to realize I have moved beyond anger. I noticed hanging out with another friend I enjoyed last night, that what we had in common is an absence of fighting-mind. I hadn't fully realized it until then, but I have felt almost no anger the last couple months. I think the combination of facing mortality near me this year, vegetarianism, and living with a focus on spirituality and service has granted me an energized life with little room for that indulgence.

I see how we have only this moment now, and I will not waste it attending to anything other than Love.

dream

getting out of the city has been useful

to realizing chi is indeed free
and thus living the dream

quiet comes to me now
and i am enjoying practicing requests:

do you need labor?
can i borrow your truck?
how can i help?

-----

yesterday i milked the goats again
getting the hang of using two hands now

the day before i hauled a truckload of wood
after work which is going fine as well

and saw a rainbow on the ground

today i hope to build the garden
after getting propane

and buying peaches from a friend
at the farmer's market

sunday i'll unload hay for another friend
and then borrow his truck

to move a sauna up to the land
and who knows

what tomorrow will bring?

-----

i enjoy deeply restorative sleep most nights
after long days of labor

i enjoy vegetarian fare tremendously
feel strong and peaceful

eating homemade tortillas and beans

abundant exchanges happen
when all is a giveaway

that is what the ponderosas say
or is it the wind

moving through them?